#1799

My ex husband tried to make me commit suicide. He wanted a divorce but didnt want to divide assets.Some of the things he said when he was raging at me were that my daughter was ashamed of me, she didn’t like or love me, she couldn’t stand me.I felt so miserable, I wanted to die. I called my daughter, she said she didn’t care, she didn’t want to hear anything bad about her daddy, to call a hotline. I was hurt and said something mean to her that I didn’t mean. She cut off anycontact since then, that was almost 2 years ago.My ex and his mom have taken interest in my daughter now. Everyone acts like I never existed.Those two were my world.I keep trying so hard to hold on. Everyday is like a nightmare I can’t wake up from.It hurts so bad.I keep thinking about eating all my heart medicine at once. I think I’ll just go to sleep and not wake up again.I don’t want to live feeling like this.Everyday is worse than the last one.I love my daughter and ex with all my heart. They don’t love me anymore.I don’t want to live like this. I don’t know how much more I can take.Trying really hard to hold on.

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  1. You are a human being, you have your own life, I am someone’s daughter as well, I am not even in college actually but I know I wouldn’t had been able to do the stuff your daughter did to you… My family too has problems a lot, fights and abuses but I tried my best to hold the family together since 4 year old, and from your words I think you are a very caring mother and you saying harsh and mean words is justified, so don’t beat yourself up for that, neither do you have to beat yourself up for feeling like you are not enough for them. To care for someone who doesn’t care for you is suicidal itself, it’s not healthy, I may come off as rude and cold but I must tell you to ignore them as well, Move On… Take yourself out to dinner, buy stuffs, meet people outside the circle of your everyday life, keep in touch with people who are kind, kick out the toxic people of your life. Focus on your own goals, you *had* a misfortune and that was your family, you have nothing holding you down, rise up as a strong human being, share your stories of recovery, motivate other people. You are not alone, you never walk alone. There are people who is waiting for you to enter their life, make it memorable, never regret anything! Repeat! Never regret anything!

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