I felt someone hug me from behind.
I jumped, shocked, thinking that I was losing my mind, that the hug was merely a figment of my imagination.
But it wasn’t.
Because when I turned my head around, you were there. I don’t quite remember the expression you wore, if you were smiling or frowning, if your eyes showed even the slightest bit of concern, or if you simply remained unfazed; but I do remember the way you hugged me, when no one else did.
Well, someone else did try to. A girl who I wasn’t quite close with approached me. She was one of the many students who surrounded the two other girls. She was a kind person, so I would’ve let her hug me, but you didn’t.
I remember the two of you yanking on my arms, as if I was a piece of rope in a tug-of-war game. You eventually won, and you pulled me close. I remember how tight your arms were wrapped around my body, the way you smelled, the way your body pressed against mine- as if you would never let me go, and I remember the way your voice sounded when you said, “She’s mine”. I remember how it felt, actually feeling like you belong to someone.
I remember you doing a thumbs-up a million times on the way to the canteen, making me laugh, mouting the words “are you ok?”. I would smile, and raise a thumbs-up in return.
I remember how lucky I felt that day, and how lucky I feel to have you.
And I always will.
Because even if you don’t remember, I will.
I will remember you being sad over the fact that I referred to us as “close friends”, convincing me that we were “best friends”, and making me feel really guilty.
I will remember the time when you hugged me when no one else did, saying that I’m yours.
I will remember talking to you on the bus, the first time we’ve vented to each other. I will remember laughing as we pointed at random plate numbers.
I will remember the times where we sang silly songs together, even sad ones. Even if I wasn’t exactly the best singer, you’d nod your head and sing along.
I will remember the times that you approached me so that I wouldn’t feel lonely.
I will remember those memories with you like they’re the most precious things in the world to me.
Because even if you don’t, then I have to. Because if I forget too, then these memories will disappear, they will be only fragments of the past, forgotten and left behind. So I won’t forget.
I won’t forget about why I still find the energy to get up in the morning. I wont forget about all my reasons, and the people connected to them.
Because they, along with you, make life colourful, happier, and much more worth it to live.